Ehhh…I feel a little strange, ne, writing an entry like this (＞＜) Good thing I'm never going to show it to anyone♪ fufufu~
Yesterday was a really busy day (＞＜) For Abe, too. He spent the whole day rehearsing, and then had to work extra-late for some reason (sweat) Since I figured he'd be tired, I went over to his place to wait for him v He really shouldn't leave a spare key under the mat (＞＜) It's dangerous!!!!! But it was good for me, at least (grin)
It was a cozy feeling, somehow, making dinner by myself in Abe's kitchen v Almost like I lived there, ne... Abe came home around 8:30, and he was completely exhausted (＞＜) But he seemed glad to see me, and we spent a long time kissing at the front door (grin)
Iyaaaaaaa, it's strange to say that!!!!! I think I'm still getting used to it, ne v
It was kind of mean of me to kiss him like that when he was so tired, though, I think (grin) He was helpless~!!!! Too tired to fight me off~!!! I'm such a forceful person, ne (grin)
Anyway..... After that, we had dinner, and talked about different things while we ate v Abe was a little more awake then, but he still seemed super-tired (＞＜) Kyaaaa, I felt bad for him!!! I know what it feels like to be that exhausted.... It's not fun~~ (tear) I told him he should just go to bed, but he wanted to stay up for awhile v He tried to help me clean up the dishes, but I yelled at him to go rest on the couch, and so he went (laugh) He was too tired to argue, I think.
When I was done with the dishes, I went out and sat with him♪ He was almost asleep, but he still wouldn't go to bed!!!!! So we just sat there for a little while v Aaaaaaaaahhhhh, I love sitting like that~!!!! So close, with our arms around each other~~~~♪ It's a warm feeling, ne v I think I could've sat there all night~♪
But after awhile, I noticed that Abe's head kept drooping (laugh), so finally, I made him go to bed. This time, too, he was too tired to argue. I had to help him get undressed and into bed, but before I could leave, he pulled me down into bed with him~~!!!! I don't think he was very much awake (laugh) But I laid down with him anyway, and while we were holding onto each other, he fell asleep v
I guess it's okay to say it here… I watched him sleep for awhile (grin) While I watched him, I thought about a lot of things, some of them a little serious. "How did this happen??" "Can it really be true??" Things like that, ne. After all....I spent a very long time feeling like I really loved Abe, but I never thought he might feel that way about me. It's still really strange!!!! (＞＜)
Haauuuu~ But I think that slowly, I'm getting used to it v I just hope Abe can be patient with me while I do v
Anyway, this morning, I got out of bed super-quietly to make breakfast v This time, I didn't trip on the blankets and make a big crash, so Abe didn't wake up (＞＜) I stopped in the computer room to write an email to Yanagi, though, and while I was writing-- USO! Abe was up!!!!!! (＞＜) My surprise breakfast was ruined~!!!!!
Iya, actually he was just going to take a shower (grin) I still had time to make breakfast, which was........
☆!!!!LOVE OMELETS!!!!!!!☆ (grin)
I made omelets for Abe one time before, but he was out of ketchup (tear) This time, though, I made sure to bring some from home fufufu~ The one I made for Abe looked like this:
Kyaa, I smeared some of the letters a little (＞＜) Ketchup is hard to write with, ne?? (laugh) But it must've still tasted good, since Abe ate the whole thing v
After that, we had to get ready for work (tear) Even though I was the one who made a mess of his kitchen, Abe insisted on cleaning up v I think he still felt guilty for falling asleep so early (grin) So I went to take a shower, and pretty soon, it was time to go~~~♪
Aaaaahhh, I didn't want to leave!!!! (＞＜) I've felt that sort of thing before, ne, where I don't want to go away from someone, but this time it was really bad (sweat) So I attacked Abe at the front door again (grin) We kissed for a long time, but finally, we knew we'd have to go or risk being late (＞＜) Kyaaaa, I hated leaving~~~
Is that bad??? It seems like a bad thing, ne, to want so much to be around another person… It feels a little dangerous, like my happiness isn't in my control anymore. It's scary, ne? (sweat)
But…I feel like I can trust my happiness to Abe♪ He'll do his best to protect it, and I'll do the same for him v For certain v
…aaahhh, I feel better now that I wrote all that down (sweat) It's hard, not being able to write about these things in my journal or my column!!!! (＞＜) But I really can't, ne. I don't know how people would react, and Hilty-san would kill me if he found out I was talking about such personal things on the internet (＞＜) I guess that's what they call "image," ne…
But someday, I hope I can write freely about these sorts of things. Until then, I'll just quietly enjoy the time I have with Abe, and write all about it in private entries (grin) v
Another private entry, ne?? Haaaai~ There are some things I need to write about… (sweat)
Yesterday, Abe had rehearsal for half of the day, then was going to see his friend Man-chan's show v He invited me to go along, but I couldn't get away (＞＜) Hilty-san was still mad that I wasted so much time on Wednesday when I was distracted, and so he made me stay late~~ Hidoi~!! (tear)
When I called Abe to tell him that, though, I guess Man-chan was nearby and listening (＞＜) I found out that Abe had already asked him for an extra ticket to the play, and Man-chan thought Abe was bringing a date (sweat) Iyaaaa, of course he thought it was a girl!!!!! (＞＜)
Anyway… When I was on the phone with Abe, telling him that I couldn't go to the play, Man-chan overheard and started talking in the background, telling Abe that he wanted to meet me (＞＜) "We should go have drinks after the show!!!" he said (＞＜)
Abe was trying to politely refuse, ne, and I felt bad (sweat) After all, Man-chan's one of Abe's best friends v They've been in lots of musicals together, for years and years... So I told Abe that we should go, and he was a little surprised, but he agreed.
Kyaaaaaaaaaaaa, I was so nervous!!!!!! I know it's silly, ne v But Man-chan's feelings mean a lot to Abe, and what if he didn't like me??? Or what if he thought it was too strange, Abe being together like this with a man...?? Though I wondered if Man-chan would even know (sweat) Like at the sushi restaurant on Tuesday, when the owner-san and his wife both thought I was Abe's girlfriend (＞＜)
For a minute, I thought about dressing so I looked especially like a girl, but that seemed really dumb, so I didn't do it (sweat) I wore my lucky shirt, though, just to be safe♪ It's not a very nice shirt by now, since I've worn it so much....but the luck's still good, and that's what matters, ne?
Anyway....I was too nervous to do much while I waited for Abe, so I got on the computer for a little while and tried that yahoo messenger thing again v I talked to Aiba-kun for a little while, and because I was so nervous, I blurted everything out to him and probably sounded really crazy (laugh) But he was really nice about it, ne, and I felt a little better after.....
But then it was time to go!!!!! (＞＜) I was almost late, actually, because I lost track of time on the computer (sweat) I had to run to get to the train, and finally got to the place we were meeting with only a minute to spare fuuuu~
Abe was waiting for me outside, and I was really glad that he was alone (sweat) Man-chan was inside (＞＜)
But somehow, when Abe hugged me and we kissed hello, I suddenly wasn't nervous anymore♪ Being with Abe, it's hard to feel anything but good, and so I was unexpectedly okay after that v We went inside holding hands, and went over to meet Man-chan, who was at a table near the back of the restaurant v
(roar of laughter) He was really surprised!!!!! He stood up when he saw us coming, and he looked at Abe........and then he looked over at me.........
He knew I was a guy right away, which was good, at least♪ I was really afraid he wouldn't, and then we'd have to figure out a way to tell him (＞＜) But my lucky shirt worked, because he knew right away v He opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but no sound came out for a long time (laugh) Abe was kind of nervous and squeezing my hand really hard, but he still managed to introduce us. "Man-chan, this is Kime..." <--Like that, ne v
Man-chan just kept staring at me!! (＞＜) But then finally, he laughed a little bit and smiled, and shook my hand really cheerfully v
Instead of pretending like there was nothing strange going on, he came right out and said that he hadn't realized I'd be a guy!!!! I laughed, too, and told him that it was okay, and we sat down and had a fun conversation v
Aaaahhh, I was so relieved~~!!!! Man-chan was really nice, and he and Abe have a really great relationship v It seemed that he didn't suspect at all that Abe might have feelings for a guy, but once he knew, he accepted it right away v He was super-nice to me, and I felt like Man-chan and I might be friends, too, by the time we were done talking v
Man-chan's a little crazy, though (laugh) He talks really fast and laughs a lot, and sometimes yells out things randomly... IYA!! He's like Tuti!!!!! (roar of laughter) But he's really fun to be around, and I can see why he and Abe are such good friends v
Anyway, we sat around and talked and had drinks for a few hours, and then Man-chan said he had to go. He'd done a long performance that day, and he had another one coming up the next day (sweat) But before he left, he gave Abe a big hug, then hugged me, too, and said that he was really glad I'd wanted to come meet him. It was kind of an emotional moment, somehow, because I was so glad he seemed to like me!!! (laugh)
After that, Man-chan left, and Abe and I went home, too v When we were walking to the train station, Abe confessed that he'd been really nervous about meeting with Man-chan!!!! Kyaa~!!! I was really glad he hadn't told me that before we went into the restaurant, or I would've been super-nervous again (laugh)
But everything turned out okay, ne, and Abe said he was really glad that we'd been able to do something like that v I was glad, too, and feeling extra happy thinking about how we'd be spending the whole weekend together~~
That was another thing we talked about at breakfast, ne, what we were going to do all weekend v It's our first weekend as a couple, isn't it!!???? We both wanted to spend it together, so we decided to stay at Abe's house together v We could've gone to my apartment, but Abe's is nicer v Plus the sushi place is close by~!!! (laugh)
Anyway.... Right now, it's the middle of the afternoon, and I'm on the computer while Abe's taking care of some work things downtown v I wish he could've stayed, but I understand. We're both so busy, ne… (＞＜) I'm lucky there's nothing I have to do this weekend v ......though I didn't tell Hilty-san I wasn't going to be at home~~ I did it so I wouldn't have to tell him what number to call if he needed me♪ <--evil
Go-men neee, Hilty-san~! …ｷﾗｷﾗ
So far, the weekend has been really nice v We're just doing quiet things, like talking and watching TV together, but aaaaahhhhhhhhh, it's really wonderful v We're doing a lot of kissing, too, fufufu~ Somehow, since becoming a couple, we've become very focused on touching and kissing~~ We've become perverts!!!! KYAA!!
Like this morning, we both took a shower at the same time♪ (grin) I don't think we can do that on weekdays, though, because it takes so long to get around to washing~!!! It's too difficult, ne, being so close without touching and kissing~~ v And because we do that for so long, the water gets cold and we have to wash up with it like that!!! (＞＜) Iya, no fun~!!!
But I don't mind very much v And I think that if I'm with Abe, I don't mind being a dirty old man who thinks about sex all the time (grin)
I'm not sure what we'll do for the rest of the day, or tomorrow... We might go out for sushi again, if Abe isn't tired of it by now (laugh), or we might go grocery shopping and cook dinner together v It sounds boring, ne? But really, it's something that makes me very, very happy v <--Eh?! Just cooking food together??!
Hai♪ Because I'm a really silly person, ne, and just being with Abe makes me happy v Even if we're not doing anything special.... Hai. I wonder if he feels the same way about me…?
I hope so, ne. Then he won't mind so much that he's stuck with me (laugh) Because I'm not leaving~!!!!! Now that he's confessed, I'm going to stay as close to him as I can, even if it makes me a big nuisance!! He'll just have to deal with it, ne (grin)